Do you guys know what I enjoy most about being a dating coach?  I get to hear all the gossip.  Yep, that’s right… every single down and dirty details… I’ve heard it.

If you think women tell their girlfriends everything, people tell me everything and more.  If someone is hot with clothes but not without, I know it.  If someone is awesome at sucking cock, eating pussy, loves rough and raw sex like no other, I know it too.

If the guy/girl you are going out with is a boring date, I know that as well.  What the guy/girl doesn’t know is that they aren’t going to get any anytime soon with the person who told me about them.

From overly small or large body parts, to bedroom quirks, to extremely good or bad dates, to stupid relationship fights, to unexpected emotional wounds, I get it all.  And the funny thing about it all… I don’t judge people any more positively nor negatively for it.

I still love it:  the gossip AND the people!

That’s what makes love great, doesn’t it?

And this is where the following letter comes in.  This is what one of my former clients experienced with one of his online dates.  The first couple times he met her, everything seemed pretty kosher.  Little would he know he was in for a surprise.  So with his permission, I’m reposting a parody letter he would have loved to send to the said Psycho Girl.

Read on to find out what happened. (more…)

People must be liking the new direction I’m taking with the blog.

Today, inspired by my “First Impressions” series of blogs (first couple stories are here and here), Donnie wants to share a personal story.  He is going to talk about how to not let the monkey chatter cloud your mind and make the best out of your first few interactions with someone.

If you have a an insightful and entertaining story you want to share that truly speaks of how people really think while dating or socializing, email me.  I don’t think you need “gurus” to show you how to date better.  When it comes to improving your chances at meeting and attracting the people you want in your life, I believe we can all learn from each other if we shared more of our experiences with one another.

And Kiss N’ Tale is the place for you to do that!

Right now, the series is about “first impressions” or “first love/lust.”  I also would love people to write about bad sex, interracial dating or being too much of a nice guy.

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Have I been wrong all along?  Back track to a few months ago, to when I was just starting to open myself up and really put myself out there to meet people, everything I saw was what I believed to be real.

I’d work myself up the courage to go and talk to the cute girl behind the counter at the coffee shop and rather than just placing my order, I would talk to her and see what she is all about.  We’d have a good fun conversation that would last for a good few minutes depending on how many people were in line (usually I went up when there was no line) or until I had exhausted the conversation and felt like I had left a good impression.

So what happened the next time I saw her?

I’d walk into the coffee shop and I’d instantly look to see if she was working that day.  When I saw her and she’d look up at me and then look back at what she was doing, all I could think about was:  “Did I creep her out?” “Does she not remember me?” “Should I just leave?”.  Explosions of monkey chatter would go off in my head when in reality, she was just working and being focused on her job, nothing personal.

Do you find yourself “expecting” things from women?  When you think about it, how many times have you not talked to a girl because she didn’t show immediate bubbly enthusiasm that you were in her presence?

What you see is not what you always get. (more…)

I was introduced to her.  Ironically, I was introduced to her by the girl who invited me out and with whom I was flirting with the week before.

At first, I didn’t know she was part of the group.  She was cute.  She was walking with a shorter lightly pudgy Asian guy I didn’t know either.  Her smile was the first thing that caught my attention.

Her smile was the kind of smile that whispered to me:  “Well hello there!…”

It was the kind of smile that made me want to make a mental double take, but I couldn’t… at least not yet.  I needed to focus on the girl who actually invited me out and who just walked up to me with a hug.

I acted cool, I acted “normal.”  Throughout the evening, I mostly entertained “Alya,” the girl I flirted with last week.  The evening kind of felt like a double date.  “Alya” was walking with me… and the other girl was walking with the pudgy Asian guy.  I still didn’t know if she was with him or not.

However, I would find my eyes furtively look for her.  From the corner of my eyes, I’d catch her looking back at me or maybe it was her catching me look at her.  There was that unspoken smile again.

Maybe it wasn’t even her smile, maybe it was her eyes.  There was a glimmer in her eyes that seemed to want to blurt out more than just hi.

We talked a few times to one another, never alone, always in group, occasionally joking around, teasing…

She had an allure to her…. a certain sweet, genuine, innocent vibe mixed with something utterly contradictory, a darker, sexier and much more confident energy.

I would be lying if I didn’t say I noticed the contour of her soft round chest filling her deep V-neck shirt with smooth curves that would make my mind wander in territories not so holy and leading my eyes down towards her short jeans skirt.

I like the way she walked.  I liked the way she looked at me, talked to me, smiled at me…

At one point, she and I found each other by ourselves.  “Her” guy and “my” girl walked away together to get drinks.  It turned out “her” guy was just a friend from college and “my” girl was someone she just met a few days prior.  Ironically, I just met “Alya” the week before too.

She admitted to being adventurous… or maybe spontaneous, I’m not quite sure anymore… so I called her out on it:

I dare you to stand right there, under the screen projection, and dance in front of everyone!

We were at the Museum of Natural History for First Friday, near USC.  There was a screen projection on the wall of the live band playing.  A lot of people were gathered in semi-circle there in front of that screen, watching and singing along but not dancing.  I didn’t think she’d do it.  I was just teasing her.

Do you guys notice the projection screens?

Fainting hesitation yet without skipping a beat, she fired back at me:

OK, but what do I get if I do it?

Do you know what it feels like when you are in the moment with someone, the tension is high and everything you’ve felt so far seems to culminate and all crash into one single “turning-point” moment?  That’s e-x-a-c-t-l-y how I felt.  My mind was running 200 miles an hour.  I haven’t thought that far ahead when I dared her to dance in front of everybody. (more…)